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very-best-text-posts: rzkk: god created the world in 7 days well it took 9 months to create me so clearly i’m a big deal .txt
Very-Best-Text-Posts: Missingleftsock: Nataliesnicket: &Amp;Ldquo;Shit Ton&Amp;Rdquo; Is My Favorite Unit Of Measurement. Followed Closely By “Fuckload” .Txt
Swiggityswee: The Worst Thing In The World Is When Someone Offers U Chips And U Reach In The Bag But U Can’t Get A Hold Of A Chip And U Start Sweatin’ And People Are Staring Cuz U Can’t Get Hold Of A Goddamn Chip And Then Children Are Screaming
Jonboowart: Jonboowart: Jonboowart: Jonboowart: There’s An Old Man On My Bus Wearing A Sparkly Devil Horn Headband I Don’t Understand Now He’s Wearing A Hot Dog Hat This Is Not A Drill I’m Putting On My Dinosaur Hat We Can Be Hat Friends
Very-Best-Text-Posts: Kyousaya: All The Same Sex Couples Quick Get Married While The Government Isnt Looking .Txt
Very-Best-Text-Posts: Magifran: Math Is One Letter Away From Meth And Guess Which One I’d Rather Do .Txt
Hoespice-Deactivated20180619: I Forgot The Actual Saying So I Just Sent My Friend “Thank You Mr. Captain Of The Obvious Things”
Broternia: *Begins Breakdancing Gently* What’s Wrong, Son
Highmiranda: Does Anyone Else Find It Immensely Comforting To Have Someone Touching You? Not Like Poking Or Tickling You Or Like Sexually Just Feeling Some Other Person Being Beside You And Like Your Elbows Or Legs Or Something Are Touching And You’re
Teatattoo: Showers Are Fucking Incredible. Oh Ur Skin Feels Sticky? Shower. Hair A Little Greasy? Shower. Need To Escape Your Family? Shower.
Clater: I Went To A Public School Okay I Know How To Inject Heroin
Heckstasy: How To Have Sex: Spin Around S Top Double Take Three Times 1 2 3 Pelvicc Ttthhrrusuustt Woooooo Wooooo Stop On Ur Right Foot Don Tf Oregt It Bring It Arrouunnndd Town Bring It Arounnndddd Tooowwwwnnnnnn
Best-Of-Funny: Just-Laff: Never Throw Me Anything Unless You’re Ok With It Dropping X
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