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basedgosh: if a puppy falls asleep on you youre not allowed to move its illegal
Trombonered: Officialblueshell: Trombonered: A Fish Goes Up To Another Fish And Says “Whale You Go Out With Me?” Shell No You Beach
Gendercake: *Applies To Harvard As A Joke* *Harvard Accepts Me As A Joke* *Enrolls At Harvard As A Joke* *Graduate With A Business Degree As A Joke* *Starts An Extremely Successful Business As A Joke* *Creates Empire For Myself As A Joke* *Enters The
Turkeystuffer: Tatehorror: Your Tongue Doesn’t Fit Comfortably In Your Mouth You’re Right, Maybe It Would Fit Better In Yours
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Catjpg: My Kind Of Lingerie
Bagmilk: Seaking: How Turnt Up Could A Turnip Turn If A Turnip Could Turn Up
Unclefather: My Favorite Part Of Sleepovers Is When Its Like 4 Am And Everyone Is Laying Down Trying To Go To Bed And Its Silent And Then Someone Says Something Like “Ass Butter” And We’re So Tired That We Can’t Stop Laughing
Heckacute: My Résumé Is A Large Picture Of Me. There Is A Tiny Plastic Bag Of My Hair Stapled To The Corner. My Telephone Number Is On The Back.
Jennycockles: I Just Checked Facebook And…
Katara: Uɹoq I Sɐʍ ʎɥʍ
Coleytangerina: Freshly Dyed Sheep Run In View Of The Highway Near Bathgate, Scotland. The Sheep Farmer Has Been Dying His Sheep With Nontoxic Dye Since 2007 To Entertain Passing Motorists.
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